Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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