Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
