Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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