I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize
