what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
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