Tell her she can't have a vagina
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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