It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
