:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize