U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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