Joe is yelling at the trees again.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
