so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
