Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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