you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
