did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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