Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
