Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
