Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
third nipple confirmed
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
