can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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