Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
