Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
