Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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