i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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