This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Michael Bay diarrhea
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
What a dumb baby whore.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Randomize
