why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize