You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
