Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
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