honey bunches of taint.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize