Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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