is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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