Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
