drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize