i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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