lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
