...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
