Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
