tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My feet surprised me
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
