first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
im six kinds of drunk right now
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
