Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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