It's Friday. Sex?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
