Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize