Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
