The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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