Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We left the knife in your bed.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize