Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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