i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
