I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
