spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
