no you cant smoke seaweed
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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