WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
