if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize